Blog Page 2

That time Breaking Bad had to make it own murder tequila

0

During the time it aired Breaking Bad was basically the King Midas of network television, with pretty much everything associated with the show, however tangentially, enjoying a surge of public interest. Strange then that one of the things fans of the show most wanted to get their hands on, isn’t something it’s possible to buy, largely because no company production reached out to wanted their product to be seen killing a drug lord.

Mace Windu’s lightsaber can only be used by a bad motherfucker

0

According to Star Wars canon and Samuel L. Jackson himself, Mace Windu is one of the deadliest and most feared lightsaber duelists in the known universe. An exceptionally skilled combatant said to be able to tap into the dark side of the force at will, Windu is best known for his bitchin’ purple lightsaber. A lightsaber that officially belongs to a bad motherfucker.

That time a DVD haunted the fuck out of Steven Spielberg

0

To say that Paranormal Activity was a big hit would be an understatement of such massive proportions that large birds and some smaller aircraft could be sucked into and crushed by the gravitational pull it would produce. A fact that has a lot to do with, of all people, Steven Spielberg and, if he is to be believed, a ghost that haunted a DVD the film was stored on.

That time a 500lb man beat up a bear

0

The title of world’s fattest man is one that has, somewhat ironically, been held by a series of ever-increasingly large men, some of whom were wholly immobile as a direct result of their massive size. The same cannot be said of Daniel Lambert a man who despite being the heaviest human being alive during his lifetime, was sufficiently strong enough to carry not just himself, but several men at once.

FBI Agents have to wear shit, baggy suits

0

According to official FBI materials and interviews, contrary to the image you likely have in your mind of FBI agents spending 99% of their time in an immaculately tailored more form-fitting than a Lycra thong, special agents with the FBI probably spend less than 5% of their time wearing a suit. A suit we feel compelled to mention, an individual agent is heavily advised to have tailored specifically so that it doesn’t fit properly.

You see, while media featuring the FBI in any capacity would have you believe the entire agency is staffed by burly men in black suits and impossibly bitchin’ sunglasses stood around looking all smug with one another …

The truth is that FBI agents have a remarkable amount of leniency in how they’re allowed to dress, at least, relative to what pop culture likes to show. For example, multiple sources we consulted, including the FBI’s own handbook on the matter, notes that the way an individual agent chooses to dress is entirely up to them with only the most outlandish and extreme styles of dress and grooming being explicitly forbade. Largely so that an agent’s individual appearance doesn’t detract from the public’s perception of the FBI being all business all the fucking time.

In fact, it’s specifically noted that special agents are free to use their own judgement when deciding how to dress unless the scope of their given duties specifically require them to wear something else. You know, like if they’re undercover or something.

So what does this have to do with baggy, ill-fitting suits? Well on the occasion an FBI agent has to wear a suit, it is heavily advised that they wear, at the very least, a blazer that is several sizes too large. With some advising that an agent’s entire suit should be slightly too big.

Why? Well in short it’s so that an agent can both disguise the fact they’re carrying and easily access a gun. You know, in case they have to cap a motherfucker trying to rush the president or something. Likewise, a slightly baggy suit affords an agent more freedom of movement in case, again, shit goes down and they have to kick some ass.

A sentiment that while making absolutely perfect sense, is a little disappointing to learn because it means John Wick isn’t as realistic as we thought it was.